Monday, January 22, 2007

Things are plugging away here Chez Single Mother er, Yarnpirate. They're actually going fine, all things considered. Mr. YP completed his move out, there was minimal (no) drama and everyone is friendly. Less than two hours to remove everything from the house that was going to go. It seems like it should have been harder than that, to me. I haven't really had time to process or think about things because I've been working and life has been throwing shit at me as fast as I can catch it, but I imagine it'll sink in eventually. Maybe it is, a little. Bit by bit. Things look really different around here.

2007 is kinda fired. Today, on top of everything else, I got nailed with an overdue dentist bill for $800 and our dentist informed me that the youngest needs orthodontia. Like, now. Or her jaw will stop growing and it'll be 3x as expensive. But they'll take payments. Head, meet desk. Oh, and when I came out of the dentist's office? Hello! Hi! Yes! I had a parking ticket. Swell! FIRED. Not even laid off. I don't think 2007 gets to collect unemployment, at least not based on current performance. I am going to need to see significant improvement, and fast.

I think I've done half a repeat on my painter's scarf and two rows trying to turn the heel on my Baud sock since Thursday? Wednesday? I just haven't had time. Too busy trying to reclaim what's left of my life and figure out where we all go from here.

I am crediting Lime and Violet with my sanity during this process. I can sit and laugh while I do whatever thing I'm doing all by myself at the time, and I feel like I'm hanging out with my friends. Believe me, some nights, when the kids are in bed and the house is quiet? I need to feel like I'm hanging out with someone. Since I can't listen to L&V all the time, I should also give mad props to Target for my sanity. Running out to Target and wandering the aisles and looking at shiny things is also helpful. I can buy a 3 pack of wooden spoons for < $2 and it is therapeutic. They have a ginormous selection of nifty plastic containers for organizing things and I pretend that if I could afford to buy them, everything would work better and also make sense.

I know, I know. This is supposed to be about knitting. I promise, more sticks and string when things chill out. I will not be Whiny McNegativityson forever, I promise.

I am going to go organize something. I ponied up for a plastic container today and I'm gonna see if my theory really does work.


Lucia said...

As the song says, even pirates have the right to scream. (Or something like that.) May your year get better.

Oh, and supposed to be about knitting? What is this supposed to? You can make it up as you go. In fact you have to. I hate that.

Mouse said...

I'd also like to fire 2007 for doing a sucktacular job! I say we pick our own number (how does 4913 strike you?) and start our OWN year that doesn't suck!
Oh, and if this 'knitblogging' thing was actually supposed to contain real knitting.. I'd have had to quit a long time ago. Hee hee.

Laura said...

Yeah, '04 through '06 were like that for me. So I'm hoping '07 improves, too. And is GREAT for preserving/restoring sanity, too.

Lick My Sticks said...

Ugh, sorry to hear about your year kicking off with a shitty start, I certainly knew the feeling as I was moving to my FIFTH apt. in 3 years literally ON New Years eve.

Here's to February redeeming 2007...I hope!

Geogrrl said...

It's your blog, write what you want.

It sounds like it's been an awful year, so far. I would say you're going through the worst part right now, and it's a legitimate grieving stage.

I'm glad Lime and Violet are helping; I also love listening to Cast On when I'm depressed as well as Sticks and String. In fact, I go hunting for stuff to listen to. I recommend Chub Creek for the aural wierdness.

Retail therapy is good too.

I'm so impressed that you managed to give money to L&V as well as the Lime Project, all things considered. I stand in awe of your generosity and money management skills.

Thinking about what you said, I can't imagine what it must have been like for my mother. Dad died suddenly at 44, leaving her with three small children (4 to 6 years of age) and a teenager to raise. Gah. Mom handled it, but the first while must have been awful.

Don't feel bad about feeling bad. Just make sure you don't stay there. I know after my hysterectomy 10 years ago (age 31) I spiraled into a depression. Using a journal to write down my thoughts helped; for some reason, setting them on paper short-circuited the way my thoughts were going in endless little circles. That aside, what I noticed after a while was that I'd start into one of those negative little thought patterns and one part of my brain would say, "Yeah, yeah. Heard that already and utterly bored with it. Move on."

That's when I knew the grieving process I went through was over.

I'm not saying your brain will say that exact thing to you, but over time you will find your thoughts dwelling on all of this less and less. And eventually you will have moved on.