Sunday, February 12, 2006

I got to a place today where I had to decide that it really didn't matter if I couldn't finish my Olympics project. See, that glitter lovin', fire spinning raver guy I'm married to has been really sick for over a week. It seems to be some kind of nonspecific viral infection with raging high fevers and no other symptoms which I admit, is baffling. He was running a 103 fever last Saturday at CNY when he was all fire spinny, and while I applaud his attitude that "the show must go on." it has crossed my mind that JUST MAYBE spinning fire and being shiny until 5am last Saturday with a fever that high was A DUMB IDEA. Because this Wednesday, after going to work for 3 days with that fever, he sorta went down and stayed down and hasn't gotten out of bed since.

What I love about modern healthcare is that you can have a primary care doc, you can have been a patient there for 5 years and still when you call and explain that it is urgent and emergent and you need an appointment today thanks, they will STILL tell you, "Oh gee sorry, we can't get you in until next thursday." and then you might say to them, "Well why on earth do I have a primary care doctor if I can't GET IN TO SEE HIM WHEN I NEED AN APPOINTMENT." and then the receptionist might say something like, "So go to the ER if it's that bad." and THAT is when you have to get all Samuel L. Jackson about things and point out that ERs don't want you if you have primary care docs, unless you are, oh, DYING. In maybe a caustic tone of voice. And maybe then you get so insistent, they agree to squeeze you in first thing Monday morning. Ordinarily I make a point of being absolutely, beautifully polite to people who work in doctors offices and customer service. I consider it my obligation to do so. It is the little niceties that mean so much nowadays. There are times, however, when I will break my policy of niceness rules and I will turn into the biggest bitch you ever met until I get what I want from you. Do not tell me to go to the ER. Give me an appointment. And then go make me a sandwich. /southpark>

Because my other half has been laid up for so long, I have been for all intents and purposes, a single parent for the duration. I am very tired. I am very stressed out. It's been a LONG couple of days.

Harissa! had their debut at Synergy Cafe in Culver City last night. It was utterly splendid, a smashing success and may it just be said, our milkshake brought all the boys to the yard. (If you want lessons, there is, in fact, a charge.) I did a lot of running around and promotion and work during the preceeding days and the day of the show we had to set up which was way too early in the morning and took forever and involved yet more running out to hardware stores and heavy lifting. Herding cats during the performance, then staying after and tearing it down and shlepping it home. A dance troup is a really shiny entity. We all do our part, we all contribute and then the reward is two hours of sheer magic. I have to confess that it is a tiny bit hard for me at the end of the show, when everyone gets up and takes their bows and the audience is clapping and I was as much a part of things as anyone but I'm not up there with them. What the audience doesn't get or doesn't see, doesn't applaud, is the person behind the curtains, behind the scenes. The person who hung the tapestries and arranged the set, who worked the sound, burned CDs, promoted the show, made phone calls and last minute runs to the store, who pinned people into costumes and found veils at the last minute before a panic could set in and made sure cues were met. That's me. I'm the invisible person. I help make the magic too. But nobody knows it. Anyway, I think I got to bed at 2:30 last night.

Today I got some knitting done at the obligatory Saturday trip to the dog park, a little bit more between bouts of cooking, washing up, checking fevers, making broth and all that. I'm encouraged, I only have 6 rows before I start the decreases for the sleeves on the sweater back, but I have had to accept the fact that for me, winning the gold may just mean knitting consistently, a little every day, regardless of what else is going on. That's good enough for me.


Z said...

You have achieved Michelle Kwan-ness Grasshopper :)

Will Pillage For Yarn said...

AHAHA yeah but I'm not withdrawing and amazingly enough, having given myself permission to just, do what I can? I'm all renewed and enthusiastiac about the process this morning.

Z said...

I look at my pathetic sock with the sorta-ribbing (I am now going to straight knitting/perling to the heel) around the top and I aint ripping it out. I'd never finish if I ripped out even though what I have done MAY not even BE knitting LOL.